Ludus Vita : Last Game Part 2 (Finale)

Ludus Vita

Written by: Heara

The Final Game

[A/N: Hi everyone! It’s me Heara. We’ve come to the final part of my first ever series. **SOBS** I am so happy for your warm support. To be honest, I think I fail to be so dramatic with this one. Sana din nabigyan ko ng enough justice ang mga characters dito. I do love to have some honest opinion about this. I’ll be very happy to chit and chat with you guys! :) http://flavors.me/hearaetcuban#_ Di ko na patatagalin pa ito Final Game starts here!]

  DISCLAIMER: This story is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any person, place, or written works are purely coincidental. The author retains all rights to the work, and requests that in any use of this material that my rights are respected. Please do not copy or use this story in any manner without my permission.

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Ilang araw na ako nandito pero isang beses ko pa lang ulit nakikita si Kuya eh yun yung pagdating ko tapos nagmamadali pa siyang umuwi. Hindi rin niya ako tinetext at tinatawagan, inisip ko lang busy siya sa work pero nung kinamusta ko siya sa Secretary niya ang sabi almost 3 days na daw hindi pumapasok si kuya kaya naman pinili ko ng puntahan siya sa Condo niya.

Nakasampung katok ata ako sa unit niya pero walang sumasagot. Sabi naman ng receptionist kanina bago ako umakyat eh andyan siya. I tried to open the door, it’s not locked and I was surprised, magulo ang condo niya. Mga basag na gamit, mga nakakalat na basura at damit, mga napabayaang hugasin at mga alak na nakatambak kung saan-saan. Nagmadali akong pumunta sa kwarto ng kuya ko at nagkasalubungan kami dahil papalabas din siya. Nanlumo ako sa itsura ng kuya ko. He looks miserable, mukhang kulang sa tulog at di kumakain.

“Kuya…”

“What are you doing here?” he looks irritated.

“Kuya anong nangyari sayo?” pag-alala kong tanong sa kuya ko. Hinawakan ko siya sa braso.

“Ang sabi ko what are you doing here!?” tapik niya sa sakin. Nagulat ako sa ginawa niya.

“Kuya may problema ka ba? Sabihin mo sakin. Makikinig ako.”

“Wala. Umalis ka na. ayaw kita dito.” Pagtataboy niya sakin. Hinila niya ako papalabas ng condo niya.

“Kuya, ano ba.” Bitaw ko. “Kitang kita naman that you have a problem! Look at you! You look… miserable.” Then his face darkens and then he laughed. He laughed like a psycho and that cause goose bumps around my skin.

“Miserable you say? Sayo ko pa talaga narinig yan Lia. How fascinating.” Tapos tumawa siya ulit.

“Ano ba kasi problema mo kuya? Sabihin mo naman sakin.”

“Don’t be so eager to know what is my problem, darling. Because the problem is you.”

“Ako? Kuya, di ko naiintindihan…”

“Di ba gusto mo malaman ang problema ko? Pwes ikaw yun Lia! Ikaw!”

Lalo lang akong naguguluhan sa mga sinasabi ng kuya ko. Hindi ko alam kung sadyang lasing lang siya or gusto lang niya muna mapagisa.

“Do you know about the dirty little secrets of your beloved boyfriend?” a smirk is evident of my brother’s face. Chase past? I stiffen because of the invading thoughts in my mind.

“W-what about it Kuya?”

“Iiwan mo ba si Chase pag nalaman mo ang baho ng nakaraan niya?”pagkasabi ng kuya ko. Natahimik ako. “O, Lia. Bat di ka makasagot? Sabagay, dapat mo ngang pagisipan iyan dahil hindi biro ang nakaraan niya.” My mind is like exploding and I cannot decipher what is my brother’s point in all of this.

“Kuya… ano ba talaga ang gusto mong sabihin?”

“Leave Chase. He’s no good for you.” I was dumbfounded at what he just said; confusion is now hitting on a different level now.

“Why would I leave Chase? Is it because of his past? Hindi na importante pa ang nakaraan niya kuya. Please, don’t say this.”

“Nasasabi mo lang yan kasi hindi mo alam ang nakaraan ni Chase!”

Napapikit ako at napabuntong hininga. Nasasaktan ako hindi para sakin kundi para kay Chase…

“Alam ko. Alam ko ang lahat tungkol sa nakaraan ni Chase. Tanggap ko at tatanggapin ko ang lahat ng pwede ko pang malaman sa kanya. Ang mahal ko ay siya mismo at hindi ang nakaraan niya.”

His face was ghastly and clenched his hands into my arms which are very painful.

“Hindi pwede Lia!” I’m hitting the summit of my emotions because of the variety of this situation.

“Bakit hindi pwede? Dahil maduming tao si Chase sa paningin mo dahil sa nakaraan niya? Hindi tayo mga perpektong tao to judge him!”

“WHY WOULD I JUDGE THE PERSON THAT I LOVE!?”

“Y-you...”

“Yes. I love Chase.”

Napasandal ako sa pader, nanghihina ako. I like to casually get my brain outside of my skull because of the words that being said and because of the emotions that the situation gives, my head is completely messed up. I looked at my brother whose eyes are now brimming with tears.

“Nakapagdesisyon na ako Lia. I want him. I want him for myself.”

“Pero Kuya, Chase is my boyfriend and I love him.” My voice cracked because of the tears that I’m trying to suppress.

“Ngayon lang ako nagmahal Lia and the love that I feel for him is strong enough to fight for him.” He was serious and there is no brotherly love that I could see in my brother’s eyes. Hindi ko alam kung bakit nagkakaganto ang situation naming magkapatid, never kong naimagine na mangyayari sa amin tong dalawa at dahil pa sa isang lalaki at yun ang lalong nagpapasakit ng situation ko.

“Kuya hindi naman natin kailangan maglaban pa… huwag kang ganto.” Nahihirapan na ako, parang hindi ko kilala ang taong nasa harapan ko. Kapatid ko nga ba talaga ito?

“Then give up Chase.” I gaze at him and he was expressionless at para bang may nasampal sa pagkatao ko.

“I can give up everything or anything to you Kuya but Chase is the only thing that I will not give up. NOT EVEN TO YOU.”

He frowned and shows the most terrifying smile that I could ever see in my brother’s face.

“Well then, remember this Lia. I will do the best of my ability to end your relationship.” Sabay kaladkad niya sakin papalabas ng unit niya. “Bye, Sister.”

Hindi ko naiintidihan kung bakit naging ganto ang kuya ko. Is this one of the many faces of love? Selfishness? That’s a one big bullshit! I can ignore the fact that there is a threat in my relationship but I cannot disregard the truth that the threat is my own brother! Masakit sakin na nagaaway kami. I know we have to choose a certain decisions in life… but why it has to be between family and love?

---

Night is already painted across the metro as I watch the twinkling lights of Makati in the window of my pad. I’ve been thinking too much in the past few days. Since the drunken confession of Lux, everything was a revelation to me; to know that he and Lia are siblings to Lux having feelings for me.

When he asked me about kung mamahalin ko ba siya kung nauna ko siyang nakilala, I cannot give an answer immediately because isa lang ang pumasok agad sa isip ko, I cannot imagine anything without Lia. She saved me from worst and I’m hanging onto her and her love is everything to me.

“Chase.” Lia Immediately speaks when I answered the phone.

“Lia, bat ngayon ka lang tumawag? Hindi ka rin nagtetext. Do you have a problem?” she remained silent for a moment and I hear a countless of sighs in the other line.

“Chase… M-my brother…” and she started one painful sob. Ilang beses niyang inulit ang mga ganung salita at pinipilit niyang tapusin ang gusto niyang sabihin. I know what she’s trying to say at the very first moment when she spoke about brother but I was having a hard time to say it to her.

“Your brother is in love with me.” I bite my lip trying to un-savor the way that it taste in my tongue.

“A-alam mo?”

“Yes. H-he confessed to me.”

“Chase…” humagulgol ulit siya. Narealize ko na kung nahihirapan ako mas nahihirapan siya dahil kuya niya ang nasa gitna naming dalawa. Napapikit ako at pilit kong pinapabalik ang mga luha na gustong lumabas sa mata ko.

“We’ll get through Lia. Basta wag mo akong iiwan. Please… mahal kita. Mahal na mahal kita.” I keep myself strong for her even though my soul is breaking because she’s having a hard time because of me.

“We’ll get through Chase? Pano? How can we get through when my brother is… is inlove with you.” Then the line filled with sobs of her.

“Lia.” Lingon ko sa kuya ko na nakatayo sa pinto. Hindi ko na nagawang mag paalam pa kay Chase sa cellphone .

“Kuya.” Sinarado niya ang pinto, mas mukhang maayos na siya ngayon kesa kahapon na nagkita kami. His face is painted with full of sternness, there was a difficult silence between us as he sit opposite to me.

“I will not stay too long Philia.” He paused and then he continued to talk. “I think it’s unfair to our parents to stay completely fool about Chase.” my heart is slowly sinking to the depths when he mentions our parents. “Gusto kong ipakilala si Chase, Lia.” Ngumiti ang kuya ko. “I might influence them on what I ever tell them”

“Anong gusto mong palabasin kuya?” nanginginig ako at di ko alam sa kung ano ang natatanging dahilan sa bagay na yon.

“I will tell mom that I’m against to your relationship.” Nagbago siya ng posisyon sa pagkakaupo atsaka nagpatuloy. “I know mom & dad, they are not judgemental at mababait sila… pero depende na nga lang sa pagkakasabi ko.” Ngumiti siya at tumayo. “I told you Lia, I will do my best to end this relationship.”  Napatayo rin ako at nangingilid ang luha ko sa pagkalito kung ano ang gagawin ko. “I just can’t assure you kung makakabuti ba ito kay Chase. But if you want to save him… you know exactly what to do. You have enough time to think about it Lia.” Napalingon ako sa kuya ko. Hindi ko mapigilang tumingin ng puno ng pait sa kanya. “And that time is pagkalabas ko ng kwarto mo. Pag di mo nasabi ang sagot mo sa paglabas ko, sasabihin ko na agad kela mama and papa.”

“Kung gagawin mo yan masasaktan at mahihirapan si Chase!”

“Why? Can’t I play the role as a savior of Chase?” he smirked.

“Bakit mo ba ginagawa sakin to kuya?” tears are racing down to my face.

“Nagmamahal lang ako Lia.” He remained straight face to me while I’m horribly crying in front of him.

“But this is not right!”

“What do you think is right Lia!? Huh? Ano ba sa tingin mo ang tama? May tama at mali ba sa pagmamahal? Dahil para sakin, wala. There is no right or wrong only what makes you happy and Chase makes me happy!” I could hear the intensity of his voice in my ears as the tension rises between us again.

“But your ways are wrong brother!”

“Loving him makes everything feels right and that is enough for me Lia.”

I cried more it felt so helpless to see that he is serious about this. Sino ka ba? Sino ka bang bumabalot sa kuya ko.

“You are so selfish”

“Lia, sometimes a heart cannot afford to be ‘Just Friends’ ” he flicks a gaze at me. “For you to be happy you have to be selfish and I stand to be selfish Lia and so are you.”

“How could I be so selfish when I already have him!?” healthy tears still swim down in my face. The more we exchange words to each other became more painful to me.

“Kung pipiliin mong ipaglaban siya at masira ang reputasyon niya ng dahil sayo.” He looked at his watch. “I don’t have a time to spare Lia, I think you already made your decision.”

My mind panics and without further thinking or maybe the rush of the moment I grabbed the hand of my brother and cried at his hands. In those mournful sobs are the pains that I regret to have. Just when I thought I had all the happiness in life, one fateful event that happened its either I’m losing the beautiful relationship that I have with my family or the guy that I have patiently waited in my entire life.

Why? Why do I have to endure this?

---

Tracking my way to Lia’s house I am severely troubled about her words but I’m more close to death about the discomfit that digs into my heart, crushing all those happiness, all those dreams and plans that I visualize with her. Hindi ko matatanggap at kailanma’y di ko matatanggap ang mawala siya sakin.

“Lia…”

“Chase… please. Wag mo na ako tawagan. Tapos na ang lahat sa atin… palayain mo ako.” Pagmamakaawa niya sakin.

“Lia, I don’t believe you…” sabi ko habang nakapark ako sa tapat ng gate ng mansion nila at nakatingin ako sa bintana kung nasaan si Lia.

“Ano ba kailangan mong marinig para maniwala ka sakin Chase?”

“Bumaba ka dito. Tell me straight into my eyes that you don’t love me anymore.”

“Pero Chase…”

“Then I’m not breaking up with you.”

I heard several deep breathes before she agreed to go down and see me. I didn’t wait long but I wanted to stop time, no, to steal time and take her away. To runaway with her and forget the world. The moment that I see her I wanted to run and kiss her deeply to steal her soul and have it bare hands but I refrain myself.

“Lia…” I silently uttered, I know, mahal niya pa ako at malakas ang pakiramdam ko na ang kuya niya ang may dahilan ng lahat ng to. Ang dahilan sa malungkot na mata ni Lia, it’s not the same eyes that I have loved before. It’s sad and… dead.

“Chase, umalis ka na. We’re over. Iwan mo na ako.”

“Hindi ako naniniwala Lia!” hinawakan ko siya sa braso. “Please don’t do this to me!”

“Chase, ano pa bang kailangan kong gawin at sabihin para sabihing ayaw ko na?” pumiyok siya. Ramdam ko, hindi niya talaga gustong makipaghiwalay sakin.

“Alam ko Lia, may kinalaman ang kuya mo dito. Lia, huwag mo akong iwan… please?”

“Walang kinalaman dito ang kuya ko. Ako lang talaga ang may gusto na… m-makipaghiwalay sayo.” Bumitaw siya sakin “Good bye Chase.”

“Don’t lie to me Lia!” hinigit ko siya and I jailed her face between my hands. “Look at me; tell me those words that you exactly said last night Lia.”

I could see her soft lips tremble as she tries to keep herself from crying. In several attempts of looking straight into my eyes she successfully managed to look at me. I could see the wanting of the tears to break out but she keeps her determined soul to hold on to those tears and that breaks my heart more. “Lia…”

“C-chase… I-I want t-to…” napalunok siya at pilit niya pa ring nilalabanan yung luha sa kanyang mga mata.

“Ano? Sabihin mo sakin Lia.” Udyok ko pa sa kanya. Pilit kong ipanaparating sa kanya na hindi niya kayang sabihin sakin yon dahil mahal niya pa ako.

“I-I want to…” napaluha na siya at napahagulgol. Itinulak niya ako, “Chase, please I beg you. Please don’t do this to me. umalis ka na.”

Frustration rises into my blood… I can’t accept the fact that she’s being persistent about this bullshit break up of ours.

“I Lia, I should be the one to beg you! Please don’t do this to me!” I grasp on her arms like it was symbolizes me grasping onto the life that I might lose. “Why can’t you say it in front of my face Lia? Huh?” I’m finding some possible answers as I look at her face. “You can’t say it because you still love me! Mahal mo pa rin ako Lia.”

“Ano bang pinagsasabi mo Chase! Pinapahirapan mo lang ang sarili mo! Iwan mo na ako.” Pilit siyang nagpupumiglas na kumawala sa pagkakahawak ko. Pero ayaw ko siyang bitawan at wala rin akong balak bitawan siya. Dahil, pakiramdam ko pag binatawan ko siya di ko na kailanma’y mahahawakan siya muli.

“Lia, please. I don’t care if I’ll leave miserable or to live the life of emptiness again. I-it doesn’t matter… as long as you’re beside me.” hindi ko na napigilang ilabas yung sakit na nararamdaman ko kanina pa nung sinabi niyang makikipaghiwalay siya sakin sa telepono. “Hindi mo ba alam, na ang sakit. Ang sakit ng ginagawa mo sakin. If this is joke, Lia please ako na nagsasabing itigil mo ito…”

“Sadly Chase, this is not a joke. Kaya kung pwede lang Chase umuwi ka na.” bakas na sa boses ni Lia na papaiyak na siya.

“Lia? Chase?”

Oh, great. Andito si Lux, natutunghayan niya ang papawasak na relasyon namin ni Lia. Hindi ko mapigilang magalit at isisi kay Lux ang pangyayaring to pero malakas talaga ang pakiramdam ko na may kinalaman siya dito.

“Ikaw! May kinalaman ka ba dito Lux!?” binatawan ko si Lia at gigil na lumapit kay Lux.

“Huh? Ano bang nangyayari sa inyo?”

“Wag ka ng mag maang-maangan Lux!” puno ng galit at inis ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya.

“Chase! ano ba tumigil ka na nga! Tapos na tayo kaya utang na loob umalis ka na!” hila sakin ni Lia. Muli kong naalala na may relasyon akong pilit na sinasalba. I felt all the pain rushes into my heart giving a thorn beating in my chest. It’s painful, its cursing and it kills.

“Lia! Ayoko! Hindi pwede!” mas masaganang pagiyak na ang ibinibigay ko mula sa dibdib kong kanina pa nasasaktan. Umaasang sa pagiyak ko lumabas ang mga masasakit na pagtibok nito. “Lia, parang awa mo na…” unti unti akong lumuhod sa harapan niya. Napatakip siya ng bibig at tuloy tuloy na dumaloy sa magandang mukha niya ang mga luha na pilit niyang nilalabanan. Napatingin siya sa kuya niya na halata kong nagulat at di mapakaniwala.

Sige lang Lux, gusto kong makita mo na gagawin ko ang lahat wag lang siya mawala sa buhay ko.

“Chase, wag mo gawin to. Tumayo ka na dyan.” Pilit niya akong hinihila patayo ni Lia pero ako naman ang magmamatigas ngayon.

“Chase, tumayo ka na dyan.” Tumulong na si Lux sa pagtayo sakin.

“Bitawan mo nga ako! At huwag mo kong hahawakan.” I resist myself onto him that made him and Lia to be shocked. Yumakap ako agad sa tuhod ni Lia at muling nagmakaawa sa kanya. Umiiyak na din siya at pilit niyang inilalayo ang sarili niya. Hinawakan ko siya sa kamay at hinalikan ko iyon.

“Chase… patawad pero hindi maari…” hanggang sa nagkaroon siya ng pagkakataon na mabitawan ko siya at tumakbo siya papatawid sa bahay nila.

“Lia sandali!” habol ko sa kanya.

“Chase…” pigil naman sakin ni Lux.

“Sabi ng bitawan mo ak---“

Suddenly I heard a loud screeching of wheels and a loud impact that surrounded around us. As I saw blood wraps around her fragile body lying in the ground. I feel numb…

“LIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~”

---

Kailan kaya ako huling pumunta ng simbahan? Kailan ba ako huling nagdasal? Nagpasalamat at humingi ng kapatawaran? Matagal na siguro kasi hindi ko na matandaan. Habang nakaupo kami kasama ng pamilya ko hindi ko mapigilang maapreciate ang lugar… magaan sa pakiramdam ang kaputian ng paligid.

“Lux, anak.” Hawak sakin ng mama ko sa kamay ko. Kanina pa siya umiiyak. Ako kaya? Bakit di pa umiiyak? Dahil kasi pinipigilan ko.

“Kuya, ayaw kong makikita kang iiyak ah?” she said very airy to me. “Kuya, pangit sayo pag umiiyak ka.” Hinang-hina na ngiti niya. Nagpapanic ang buong pagkatao ko habang madali naming siyang isinusugod sa ospital. Medyo naiinis na ako dito sa kapatid ko dahil daldal pa din siya ng daldal.

“Ano ka ba Lia! Huwag ka nga munang dumaldal!” sigaw ko sakanya. “Ano ba pakibilisan niyo ang pagdridrive please ! ” sigaw ko sa loob ng ambulansya. “Lia, please hang on.” Gusto ko ng sisihin ang sarili ko sa nangyari sa kapatid ko.

“Kuya, wag mo sisihin sarili mo. Yung bumangga ang sisihin mo.” Pilit niyang biro sakin na para bang nababasa niya ang nasa isip ko.

“Please Lia, just shut up and save your energy.” I uttered clasping her hands into mine as tears freely stream into my face.

Habang lumalapit ako sa gitna ng altar na pilit pinapatatag ang aking loob sa namumuong pag-iyak lihim akong nagdasal sa diyos para sa kapatawaran.

“Lia, kaya mo yan… Bumalik ka ha? Ha?” para akong batang umiiyak sa kapatid ko habang itinatakbo na naming siya sa ER.

“Kuya, alagaan mo si Chase. Ha?” mahinang sabi ni Lia sa akin. Sa unang pagkakataon, ngayon ko lang hindi nagustuhan ang pagkakasambit ng pangalan niya sakin.

“Lia, hindi ako karapat dapat ang mag-alaga sa kanya kaya. Be strong.” Mahigpit na kapit ko kay Lia.

“Kuya…”

“Lia, patawarin mo ko…” muli akong humagulgol…

“Wala kang kasalanan kuya, n-naiintindihan kita… nagmahal ka lang…”unti-unting lumuluwag ang pagkakahawak sakin ni Lia.

“No! Lia? Lia?” alog ko sakanya. Nagpapanic na rin si Chase na nasa kabilang gilid niya. Nakarating na kami sa pinto ng ER at humalik si Chase kay Lia sa labi…

Hindi ko alam kung ano ang nasa utak ko nun pero idinalangin ko na sana ang halik na iyon ang magpabigay ng pangalawang buhay sa kanya.

“MABUHAY ANG BAGONG KASAL!”

Masayang bati namin kay Chase at Lia, oo, after 2 years incident ikinasal sila at magsasama ng masaya at mapayapa. I smiled to the both of them giving them my warmest and sincerest congratulations.

“Naunahan mo pa ako Lia ah?” kurot ko sa tagiliran niya na. She giggled beautifully in my ears as I looked at her… she grown into a fine young woman. A very kind hearted woman, she does symbolize her name, love.

“Basta kuya next year ah! Magmodel ka sakin.” Kindat niya. I shake my head and laugh.

“Oo na!” I turned to her newly husband. “oy, ikaw. Take care of my baby sister.” I showed my hand as a sign of congratulations.

“Salamat Lux. Maraming salamat.” He smiled; he smiled the smile that I know I cannot give it to him even in any other life.

“No Chase… ako dapat magpasalamat. Thank you.” I gave him my full of sincerity smile. Hanggang sa isa-isa na kaming pumuntang reception.

There are people who comes into our life who we’ll going to love but that doesn’t mean gonna stay. There are also people who stays in our life but it doesn’t mean we’ll gonna love them. That’s the way of love in our life. People come and go, some will stay, some will not. I learned a lot and realized one thing… Love can make you or break you and that’s the reality. May mga taong sadyang mahina at nagiging baliw… kagaya ko. I was selfish and hungry about the beauty of love when I forgot that I already have the beauty of life. siguro nga, naiinggit ako sa kapatid ko… naiinggit ako dahil marunong siyang mag intay… at ako hindi.

Good things come to those who wait and Love is one of the things that are worth waiting for. I have a very fearless opinion about Love and that is… when you love hindi lang dapat puso ang palaging pinapairal… dapat utak din sometimes… You know why? It’s not always, “I will fucking fight for the good sake name of love.” Hell, it’s not. You will fight because you have the reason and for the reason.

Mahal ko pa din si Chase pero ang pagmamahal na iyon ay ala-ala ng maraming lesson na natutunan ko. Isang aral na habang buhay na nakatatak sa isip ko.

Parang ang expert ko na kung magsalita no? I learned a lot. I learned a lot from the pain, from my mistakes, from love and from life.

I was a player… I thought I played best… but life plays it better.

No one escapes when life decides to play a game.

Ludus Vita

GAME OVER